Always The Bridesmaid...

I had lunch earlier this week with the always wise, always wonderful K, who for once wasn't dressed bettter than I was. K makes me take a look at all the disfunctional relationships I've ever encountered and suspect that even I might someday be able to crack the code of happily ever after. Anyway, while I suspect that I'll never find a boyfriend as perfect as his, I might just find someone halfway decent- I'll keep you posted on that front.

It was one of those perfect autumn days, so I decided to walk as far down Fifth Avenue as my cruel shoes would allow. I passed one movie set that didn't really catch my interest. Yawn- what was that that Russell Crowe was saying about New Yorkers being unimpressed with movie sets? It's true. They're a fact of NYC life, and you get used to seeing and avoiding them- like fresh dog poo on the sidewalk. Anyway, an even bigger set in front of the 42nd Street Library made me stop to take notice. The crowd was giddy and mostly centered around a huge towncar. One particularly obnoxious junior errand person urged the crowd to walk by and 'pretend to be normal New Yorkers.' Well, normal New Yorkers don't take too kindly to being ushered off of their sidewalks on one of the most beautiful days of the year, nor do we particularly like being talked down to, so the crowd swelled to even greater proportions.

As I walked past said limo I peeked inside and saw Sex and the City gals Kim Catrall holding a lovely posie of flowers, Kristin Davis looking vaguely bewildered and that telltale aqua feather that gave away the presence of Sarah Jessica Parker in that hideous dress (the white blob in the center of the pic- I know, the paparazzi shots are so much better than cheapo cell phone pics)- and trust me, that getup is (butt) uglier in real life. In that nanosecond they emerged from the car and I unwillingly became an additional bridesmaid to everyone's most popular and conflicted celluloid old maid. As I walked down the street to get away from the hysteria, the crowd walked along with me and the frankly scary looking SJP, who just looked pained by the process.

Let me explain for a moment, I'm the person who hates attending weddings. Not because the act of marriage bugs me, but because of the hype and hysteria involved. How ironic then, to be thrust into one of the biggest manufactured nuptials of the day.

Ain't Love Grand?

Whoops They've Done It Again- Maxim Names Unsexiest Women

Poor Britney, like she isn't having a bad enough year, what with the massive career and life meltdown and all, now Maxim magazine has named her one of the unsexiest women of the year. Topping the list is Sarah Jessica Parker and padding the center are Amy Winehouse, Sandra Oh and Madonna.

Now, I won't go all feminist on your ass about this decision, since I'll probably treat you to that in my real incarnation. I will say though that Maxim is not known for celebrating or highlighting anything that even remotely resembles true beauty in women, and since their recent makeover they've gotten even more spiteful and childish.

What I'd really like to see are the publicity shots for the sure to be pot bellied and balding, gay or aging frat boys who made this decision for Maxim.

(though to be fair, their scariest faces of celebrities feature is wicked funny)

Onward Christian Dior Soldiers....

Mean URLs 1

Coty's site for Sarah Jessica Parker's fragrances is simply Sarah Jessica Parker Beauty - 'nuff said. (Who were the geniuses who thought up 'lovely' and 'covet' anyway? Have you even seen the Covet ads from the UK? Track them down post haste,or enjoy the image to your left- you'll get the idea. Nothing says- mmm, get me some of that, like a scary looking celebrity in prison. Hmmm. Maybe SJP will start selling hair extensions next?).

Speaking of which, have you seen the press shots for Carrie's wedding (or dream sequence) in the new Sex and The City movie? (duh. who hasn't- we've been drowning in press shots) I know that they say that all brides are beautiful, but in this case I think we'll all agree to make an exception.



As you were...